This blog is about funny,humorous and serious dating and relationship horror stories and mishaps.
Friday, April 20, 2012
Are These Losers Or Is It Just Me
My name is Brianna and this is my dating story. Several years ago, I was desperately horny. That is not my usual state, but was the result of having just been through a divorce. Now divorces are not known to make you horny in themselves. My issue is that I had been celibate during most of the contest, and now that it was over I had gotten my long lost libido back in spades. My problem was that I had been out of the dating scene for a long time, was in a different decade, and really had no idea where to go or what to do to find a date. My ever helpful sister Darla told me that I should try plentyoffish. Well I told her that eating fish was supposed to be good for a lot of things, but how would that help me get it on with a man. I did not need an aphrodisiac, I needed a dick (mainly because the imitation ones were just not cutting it for me anymore)! She informed me that it was a dating site that I should try and maybe I could meet a nice guy to spend some time with. Let me tell you I was not to excited about the idea of posting my face on the internet. My sister asked me what the difference between putting my face on a dating site or putting it on facebook. So I thought about it some more and decided to give plentyoffish a try. BIG MISTAKE!
I have to agree that plentyoffish is a good name for the site. I met some barracudas and a few slimy eels, and even someone that I thought of as pond scum. Plenty of patience is what they should call it, because I ran out of it before I ever found anyone decent.
The first guy I chatted with told me he loves to play with his kids and spend time walking on the beach. When I checked his profile, it turns out that he does not have any kids at all, he was just leading me on, so I moved on.
The next guy claimed to be 35 when I was chatting with him. There was no picture on his profile, but he seemed articulate enough. When I saw him in person, he was at least 15 years older than that. And I am being generous! This guy was all duded out like an urban cowboy. Something like how John Travolta was dressed in that movie, but this turkey was older, fatter and uglier. He wanted to take me to a bar. I was polite with him for a while, but as he drank he started to get a bit surly. I did not need any of that crap, so I pretended to go to the powder room and ducked out on him. Good thing I never gave him my address or phone number. In any event, when I got home the first thing I did was to log into good old plentyoffuddyduddies and block him!
The next loser seemed nice enough online, but when I met him in person, suddenly his voice became an unintelligible drawl. Halfway between New York Ebonics and Arkansas drawl. He kept talking about us doing the deed over and over. I said that if he touched me I would yell at the top of my voice and call the cops! One more time I had to go on the lam! So there I was, blocking him on plentyofmorons at the first opportunity.
I informed my sister Darla that this dating site thing just wasn’t working and that all I was meeting were losers. She insisted I give it another go so I did, I started chatting with a guy who seemed to be very sensible, smart and funny so I agreed to go out with him.
He took me to a nice club and as we sat down at the table a few of my friends who also happened to be there came over to say hello. I asked them if they wanted to sit with us, and they agreed. After all, this was just a first date and the object was to get acquainted and see how well we interacted. To me that also meant how well he got along with my friends, so I saw no harm. My date took offence at this. He was very upset and asked me to ask them to leave. I disagreed since I had just said that they could sit with us. He made it known to me that he did not want my friends at the table with us. I disagreed and he started sulking of all things. I could not believe the way he was behaving like a child. In any event, this proved to me that he was not very suave, and it would very likely get in the way at some point. Later, my friends and I were kibitzing around cracking jokes. He honestly seemed not to be following them. He certainly was not laughing much, and when he did it looked forced. In any event, he proved to me that he was not the person that he pretended to be online. Funny how it is that you can pick up on things in person that evade you when chatting online. Needless to say, it was my last date with the bad humor guy!
After that, the online acquaintances just started to blur together. There was an accountant in there, a sales clerk, a farmer of all things, a financial consultant, and a bunch of other guys who just did not cut it for me. I was no spring chicken anymore, but I do keep in shape, and I am brutally honest. I expect the same from anybody that I hook up with. I was continually disappointed for a few more months. I just felt like I was wasting my time. I was beginning to think that a better name for plentyoffish would be plentyofnothing. Just like that old Gershwin song. It got that I would start to hum that Gershwin tune every time I logged in to the site.
As it turned out, I was by myself most of those several months. That dating site was for the birds. I told my sister that I was tired of online dating sites. They were just not working for me. I did not want to log into plentyoftimewasted any more.
She told me there was another site that some of her friends had used and they seemed to meet some OK guy's. She asked me if I wanted the link. Well I had nothing to lose but more time, and I had scads of that since I did not have any dates. To cut to the chase, I agreed and she got me the link.
So when I went to the site, I was surprised to find that it was not a dating site at all. It was actually a dating review site. It had done a lot of work to select and categorize what it called the top dating sites on the internet. It was really easy to use. I selected a couple of sites and joined. One I had to pay for, and the other I did not have to pay. Within hours I was getting results. I did find that there were a bunch of idiots on them as well, but not quite as many as I was used to tap dancing around. I am now dating a couple of guys, one from each site. They are both nice guys, they are not cheap, they do not do weird things, and I feel great being seen in public with them. What a difference. Finally, my life is going someplace good again!
I tried to figure out why I was successful on these other sites and not on plentyoffish. I think that the issue is that plentyoffish is free to everybody. Because of that, it attracts a disproportionate amount of losers. I mean, would you want to spend the rest of your life with someone unsuccessful, or someone who is too cheap to pay for something? Unfortunately, free sites tend to attract exactly the types of people who either cannot afford to pay for better (because they are unsuccessful) or else they are too cheap to pay at all. When I took a harder look at the listed sites, I realized that every one of them were pay for use sites. In a way, it gives them an advantage because it tends to filter out both cheap people and unsuccessful people. I also got a pleasant surprise on several of them when it turned out that women did not have to pay at all. Just the men. As an average female, I have been just as successful on both the paying and the non-paying sites.
So if you want some of the right kind of action, I highly recommend that you try the link below.
Top100datingpersonals.com
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